Application to Raise Salary (Adult Content, beware)

[guitarman]

Dear the management,

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:


I do physical labor.

I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I don't get paid overtime.
I work in a dark place that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.

Sincerely,
Penis


Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.

You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods.
You do not always follow orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your designated area and are often visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative; you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the
correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the
assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have been constantly entering and exiting the
workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,
Management

Source: Bro. Bun.

[indogo]

You've done it again.................LMAO.......

[tarponkeith]

My favorite was "You are unable to work double shifts. "

So true...